Untangling Toxic Love: Navigating Ancestral Curses, Supernatural Connections, and Personal Redemption

Could a relationship ever be so intense that it reshapes your entire existence? Join me as I recount the profound journey of my life-altering relationship that began in 2022. What started as a promising year of personal growth and joy morphed into an 18-month saga filled with passion, manipulation, and a dash of the supernatural. Despite warning signs and growing concerns from friends, the pull was irresistible, leading me to contemplate life-changing decisions like marriage to save my partner's visa. As the bond turned toxic, I found myself entangled in a web woven by his past, including the dark influence of his late grandfather, a witch doctor from Nigeria.

Throughout this gripping episode, I navigate a world where emotional and supernatural events intertwine, challenging my understanding of reality. After a heartbreaking miscarriage and a strange fall, bizarre incidents, including a frozen piece of paper and a moment of unnerving mind-reading, left me questioning the boundaries of our connection. As I deal with the loud, intrusive voice in my head and a desire for motherhood, I am forced to confront the mysterious ties that bind me to my ex-partner.

As my journey continues, I grapple with breaking free from ancestral curses and reclaiming my sense of self. A retreat to Portugal offers temporary solace, yet the spiritual tethers remain. With the guidance of healers and a supportive psychic circle, I embark on a path of spiritual protection and healing. This episode is a poignant exploration of resilience, as I strive to overcome past traumas and embrace new, fulfilling relationships, all while learning the importance of forgiveness—even for those who have caused deep pain.

Chapters

• 0:00 Manipulative Relationship and Dark Influences
• 10:08 Supernatural Connections and Revelations
• 13:28 Ancestral Curses and Dark Entities
• 18:27 Breaking a Powerful Curse and Healing

Transcript

Speaker 1: 0:00

Today I'm going to talk about the story of the man who pierced me using the witch doctor in his ancestral line, and it completely turned my life upside down. So, just to make you really, really aware, this happened back in 2022-23. Was it 23? 22-23, that's right? Yes, that was it. And 2022 was like an incredible year for me. I was the most confident, I was the most excited, I was dancing like in festivals. I was just living my best fucking life. It was incredible. It was an incredible year up until I met him, which would have been the July of that year.

Speaker 1: 0:37

So the first six months I had, like, started modelling, I had been on a really good weightlifting journey, I had been dancing, I had been having so much fun in my life and I would probably say I was probably the most healed in my life ever. At that point, you know, I wasn't really looking to date. But then, obviously, I met this guy on social media, as it goes, and we met through Hinge the dating app, and he was definitely on Hinge. We met through Hinge the dating app and he was definitely on Hinge. Literally, I had no idea this was going to be such. If I had known on that date, it would have affected my life for the next 18 months. Oh my God, girl, I would have ran for the fucking hills. I would have ran for the fucking hills.

Speaker 1: 1:16

So the first date that we met there were some red flags. But you know, you're there with your rose-tinted being like this man is so sexy, he's so inviting, he's so charming. I had got up and I went to walk off and one of my shoelaces had been undone. He bent down, he did my shoelace and I was like, oh my god, and he had like paid for everything and then like yeah, we went back to the car and we had like this most magnetic kiss and then we were like almost like addicted to each other, like he was constantly calling me and I was constantly calling him, we were constantly texting. It was like a really, really intense relationship. And yeah, I gotta be honest, I never really talk openly about this story because it's really wild and you know, when you've been through such a significant, traumatic experience, the last thing you want to hear is you're lying or you're making it up. Right, and I tell you now 100%, this 100% happened to me. It happened to me and I tried to think of all these different fucking scientific reasons why it could have happened or everything like, but basically it was just 18 months of hell, to be honest. So I dated thisigerian man and he was it only he's only been in the country like two, three years at that point and we came together and we just had this magnetic connection and it was just something like I never really had before and it just felt so inviting, so so connecting. When we were together it was really really connecting.

Speaker 1: 2:46

But slowly and surely I started to fade away. I think after about the third week my friend kind of commented, being like you're not really the same as you were three weeks ago. Are you sure this guy is healthy for you? But this point, I was just like way too much into this like addiction, and what I kind of realized now was that it was not just me, like I was ready to give up my family, my friends, everything for this guy. I was prepared to marry this person right, and I mean like I was prepared to marry him because his visa was about to run out and I was ready to marry him.

Speaker 1: 3:19

Like this is crazy, crazy talk. This is not like me. I would never, ever act in such a way like this and I never have acted that way. I know I'm impulsive and I'm like a bit I'm impulsive, let's just leave it at that. I'm impulsive and I will do things off the cuff, but you know, when you talk, when we're talking about big, big things like getting married, having children, all of that stuff, I just do not do that, like I absolutely do not do that.

Speaker 1: 3:45

And then what happened was we were just getting really into this intense relationship and we would be arguing all the fucking time. We'd be arguing all the time and then what would happen? Is we? Well, for the first three months we were arguing every single week and I was like I just don't know if I can do this. And he's like we have to do this. Like it's, you know, we need to make this work. You're going to be my wife, you're going to, you know, we're going to have children together. It's a whole thing. Like we can't go back on this now. We're in this, we're in this for life.

Speaker 1: 4:11

And at that time it didn't feel scary for him to say that. It just felt like, oh okay, we're in this for life, committed, and obviously, as part of this, he was a textbook narcissist, okay. So he, you know, and not like narcissistic. Oh my god, he's such a narcissist. No, this poor man like I look at him now and I feel pity because his personality is so fractured that he has narcissism where he can only think about people serving him. That is his only goal, don't matter who it is, what it is, and he actively will act out his pain across other people. Because obviously he allowed me to do some healing on him before and like, yeah, the stuff I felt like was really really dark, really really dark, sticky energy. So he was a textbook narcissist. I was only there to serve him.

Speaker 1: 5:04

Um, and when we were going through this, this whole process of me being like addicted to him and this whole like losing my sense of identity, I literally lost my sense of identity. I completely lost who I was, and this was because his grandfather was in the mix. So his grandfather passed away back in nigeria. He was a well-known witch doctor who would use voodoo or black magic, and what he had done is he had asked his grandfather to bind us together. I know this now. One because he's partially admitted it. Two, because there's been multiple people involved with this situation that has been able to reflect back to me what I already knew.

Speaker 1: 5:40

To be honest, he was so inconsistent in the relationship as well, like he would show up one minute, disappear the next, which I know can be quite common in African culture, like men are very autonomous in African culture, right, but it was just too. But it was just arguing all the time. It was not what I wanted and even though when I said I didn't want it, I would still go along with things. So anytime that we wanted to have like intimacy and he wanted it and I didn't, I would still go along with it. So that was not me fully consenting in that situation. There was, there was always things like that where he would make me do stuff I didn't want to do but I would just go along with it. And I felt like I had no sense of will or no sense of like my voice or anything and by, like a freak accident, I discovered I was pregnant.

Speaker 1: 6:29

I remember having a total nervous breakdown after this, like I totally can't even explain. I even remember like me breaking down in front of my manager at work, being like I'm pregnancy and pregnancy, I'm pregnant and I have no idea what I'm going to do. Like I don't want to have a termination, but I do not want to be with this man for the rest of my life because of how I felt at that time, because during this time, as he was draining my essence, I was also feeling like really depressed, really suicidal, really anxious. Like I was anxious. All the freaking time and the anxiety and alone should have been enough to tell me that something, something really wasn't okay. But again, I just felt like I lost all this sort of free will as part of this experience. And he was adamant that we should keep the child and I was completely freaking out. I was horrified at the prospect of us being together for the rest of my life and you know, I just knew that he wasn't going to be a good father, like I knew that he was going to come and go, there's not gonna be any reliability and I'm just going to be somebody who ends up being a single parent because I'm having to do things on my own, because that's the reality of my situation and there's nothing wrong with being a single parent. But I can think that not everybody chooses to be a single parent and I just felt like by going through this situation, I would be choosing.

Speaker 1: 7:44

Anyway, the universe had different plans for me and I became incredibly unwell and I went to hospital. I was in hospital like 15 hours and whilst I was in hospital I had a miscarriage. So when I got home from like 15 hours in hospital, I had called, like like he video called me and he was dressed up, like he was dressed up, right, it's half past five on like a Saturday evening. He's dressed up in a really nice shirt, he's looking good, and I was like what are you doing? He's like I'm going for a haircut. So he blatantly lied and he basically said that he wasn't coming to see me because he was going to get a haircut, even though I'd be in hospital and I'd lost our child.

Speaker 1: 8:18

So at that point I completely snapped and I ended the relationship and for me me, I thought that was the end. So I ended up blocking him. I blocked him. I had to block him everywhere. I had to block him on text, phone call, email, any Instagram, any means of contact. I had to block him.

Speaker 1: 8:36

And you know, we would go weeks and weeks apart from each other and then he would. He would call me and withheld and then the minute I answered the phone, I'd want to tell him to fuck off. And then, the minute I answered the phone, I'd want to tell him to fuck off. But the minute I answered the phone, I just don't know what it was like. I just completely fell into this thing where, oh, I ended up just kind of going back time and time again and my friends were like, we can't watch you do this. I actually lost friends, which, thankfully, I have back in my life now, but I did lose friends over there. So me and my mum were arguing like fuck as well.

Speaker 1: 9:05

And it was just such a dark time and you know, when I wasn't with him and I'd be like out just doing stuff, I'd be out and I'd be like driving down the road and all of a sudden, like out of nowhere, I'd be thinking about work or thinking about life stuff and then all of a sudden, a random, loud thought will come in and be like and this could be after weeks or months of us not talking, and also this wasn't the language I would use as well, right, and I was always like, oh, maybe you know there's an energetic cord between me and him, and like, because we're energetically connected, especially with a child, like you know, maybe that's it. So I do loads of cord cutting, I do a lot of energetic stuff, I did a lot of energetic healing, you know, and I would get this sudden urge and it would like be an urge that would take off my entire body to like call him, and then, as I waited it out, it would go away and yeah, when we did reconnect, we would reconnect. I'd instantly regret it. The anxiety would be unreal and that would be that, and he would just continue to drain all the energy from me.

Speaker 1: 10:08

When I had a miscarriage, I had some abnormal, abnormal like things around my ovaries and they wanted to send me for a scan to check. Just so happened that three months after the scan, after losing the child, like it was three months. So this would have been me going to hospital for my first scan if I'd still been pregnant, and I was in this like really difficult place. You know where I was like, oh, like I don't know. I just was in this really difficult place where I was like I really, really wanted to have this baby. I really wanted to have this baby. I didn't want to have this baby with him.

Speaker 1: 10:42

So on the day that I'm going for the scan. Of course he rings me, right, of course he rings me and he talks me around to meeting him. Okay, and I gotta be honest, I'm, you know, I do a little bit of witchcraft. You know, fuck around, fuck around. I don't do anything naughty, I always do things for good. That don't like impact on free, well. But so in witchcraft if you want to freeze somebody's thoughts about you, you put them, you put their name in the freezer, okay, so I'd already done this out of nowhere. Like we end up meeting, we meet in this bar and just we reconnect and you know, it just kind of feels like falling in love all over again, even though he's an absolute shit bag.

Speaker 1: 11:22

And you know, at this time I was like, oh, what's going on? Like so, anyway, I go off to the bathroom and I shit you not. I fell from the top of the stairs to the bottom. I felt like somebody pushed me and I felt so embarrassed, like obviously you jump up, don't you? You try and walk it off and I couldn't walk it off at all. Um, I'd obviously like sprained my ankle. So I managed to get back up the stairs and he was like look, I'm gonna take you home because you can't drive. And I swear to god, he like put me in. He got me into, put me on the bed, went into my freezer and he pulled out his own fucking name and went what is this? And I was like, put it back. Put it back. He never did. He put it in the bin.

Speaker 1: 12:02

So I knew that was that Also like a really funny story, which is such an overshare, right? But this is like this is such an overshare, but this is like this is such an overshare. But I don't fucking care. I'm just gonna say it because I couldn't believe that this had happened, right? So you know your girl watches porn every now and again. You know she likes to have a little watch. Anyway, there was this particular guy that was watching at the time and he would use like a train of phrase and I'd be like oh, that's just so sexy, like I just really loved hearing this guy on this porn video saying this exact line and I shit you not.

Speaker 1: 12:35

We were in my car and, like one of the times that we met up afterwards, we were in the car and we were kissing and he said the exact same words to me from this porn video. You can imagine me. I was like what the fuck? And it was quite like an unusual phrase. I can't remember where it was now, but it's like it was a really unusual phrase, like you wouldn't just say it. And that was him telling me that he knew. Do you know what I mean? Like he knew and I was like shit, this man is like I don't know if it was remote viewing, I don't know if it was him tapping into my mind like I don, I don't fucking know what was going on, but I kept hearing this voice in my head as well and like sometimes it would shout at me. Like this voice would shout at me and it would be a man's voice and it would be really loud and I just was like, oh my god, where the fuck is that coming from? I felt like I was going crazy, you know.

Speaker 1: 13:28

So after that time in, I was like or October even, I was like, right, I've got to get away. I can't fucking do this anymore. I just feel so depressed. I've lost my baby, I'm stuck in this situation with him and I never feel like I'm gonna be able to get away from him. And I just I was just like I just need to get away, like I was off work, sick, because I just felt really suicidal, and I literally ran away to Portugal like I went away and I went and I sat on that beach and I cried, and I cried, and I cried and yeah, he would just kind of, yeah, like he didn't contact me when I was away. He contacted me when I got back and you know, when I was away, I had like a holiday romance which was a really nice distraction with a professional basketball player and it was just yeah, it was just nice to kind of start to feel like me again and start to have fun, but also, really, like, by processing the loss of the baby, right, that was all that was happening.

Speaker 1: 14:23

And you know, one of the things he would always say is that no one else would have me. Nobody else would have me if he couldn't. And this was all part of this curse that he put on me. And the important part of this is that we create a bloodline. So not only does, like the voodoo, the black magic, everything carry a lot of energy, especially from his heritage, we had created a bloodline. So, obviously, even though the child was no longer with us, we had created a life together. So that meant that I was part of the lineage and that meant that I was affected even more. So you really need to be careful who you're having sex with, ladies, and who you know, and who getting you pregnant, because it can lead to a whole host of stuff that's not very good, okay.

Speaker 1: 15:07

So we went on for months like this. We were on for months like this. It felt like it was impossible to get him to leave me alone, because when he wouldn't, when he would call me on withheld, I would ignore it. I eventually got to a point where I was starting to ignore it. When he couldn't reach me, when he couldn't email me, when he couldn't do all these things, he would show up at my house and like obviously he knew all my neighbors, he made himself very friendly with all my neighbors, so they just let him in and like when he's faced at me at the front of the door, he's standing there with flowers, he's just there, he's like I've come to check how you are. Like it always resulted in us being back together.

Speaker 1: 15:42

Um, he would often tell me like he loved me, he wanted us to be a family and I think, like you know, part of me is always wanting to be in a family, like, and have my own children and be, be the wife, you know, but with him, absolutely, absolutely not. And one night, oh my god, I remember one night like this, fucking, like I felt like I was going crazy, but like he was sat on the end of my sofa. He was telling me about how much he loves me, how much he cares about me, blah, blah, blah. And I just remember there, like, sitting there, staring at him as I watched like faces of his ancestors swirl around him. He was really, really surreal.

Speaker 1: 16:13

And around this time was the time I started to get some help. So I actually had somebody come to my house and do a healing session. But on the run-up to this session, right, I had this clear visualization of this African man holding, like, these bones. I can see him in my mind's eye today. He was in traditional African dress, he had a bag, he had bones and he was smiling at me. I didn't have the like, the energy to connect to him, but I just but, like, obviously I woke up and I like from my meditation being like whoa, what the fuck? Like you're not meant to be here, and I was also in my spirit place as well, so your spirit place should be your sacred place. But he showed up there and I was like what the fuck are you doing here? Like it really really frightened me, but I didn't tell anybody.

Speaker 1: 16:53

And then, obviously, the healer came around and, um, the healer was like something fucking wild has just happened. And I was like, oh god, what he's like? There's a dark shadow in the door and I've asked him to leave and we had to like I had to force him out and I was like okay, he put all protection around my house. And then he was like this man appeared to me with traditional African dress, with a bag and with bones. I was like fuck, okay. So I didn't make this up in my mind, this wasn't like a figure of my imagination, this actually came up. So then I had like a shaman come and clean my house for me. Um, and yeah, there was something connected to the plants in my house, so we had to clean them, clear those of energy. I got rid of everything to do with him. Everything he had touched I had like saged or like thrown away, because it was just, yeah, I just needed it gone. I didn't want any resonance of his energy in my house whatsoever.

Speaker 1: 17:47

At the time I was in a psychic circle as well to develop, like my psychic, my psychic abilities, and the person leading the group she messaged me going oh my god, curtis, I think this isn't for you, but I've just had this man appear to me and show me that these bones, and she was helping me kind of protect myself and stuff again. Like you know, I felt really like, oh, like I must be a fucking crazy woman. So you know when you don't want to talk out about it, but they were coming to me and saying I'd seen these things without me saying to them, and they were also like they've not spoken to each other as well. So it was just very clear that this is. We had all seen the same person like who was showing up.

Speaker 1: 18:27

So then it literally took all three of us to come together to break this curse. It was a really hard process, took a lot of different like methods for us to work it out. Um, he also wanted to take the child in spirit with him and I was like the fuck you are, even though I felt like I was going through the, this whole thing of like losing her all over again. Um, that was awful. It was awful, but then I was able to get my nun to be the protector and to hold that child spirit. You know, because I have my, my connection to my nun, I have my connection to my daughter. Now that's in spirit. It was the most difficult process I've ever done. It's the hardest curse I've ever broken for myself or for a client, and it was just such an intense, deep-rooted darkness and you know, that's why it took three of us, it took three people to have the power to break it.

Speaker 1: 19:13

And you know, I often keep these methods a secret to protect myself because, yeah, I don't, I don't ever want these to be exposed and used against me. But I do use them if clients, if clients come to me and they're like, hey, I think there's something negatively attached to me or I'm having a curse or there's a hex or there's blah, blah, I can use these methods, um, to clear, because I'm like, if you can clear some voodoo, it can clear some, it can clear some other stuff too. And I've helped people to break obia curses, which come from like the Caribbean and you know, voodoo curses, celtic curses, that type of stuff. It's not something that I specialize in because it's a really fucking dangerous practice, right? But I know what worked for me and I'm happy to share what worked for me with others. So, even though I was in the best part of my life, like you know, the most fun whatever, the most healed the most put together. The curse worked because my, because my ex-partner had petitioned his grandfather with food and I know this now there was a strong black magic lineage in his family. We'd accidentally created a bloodline between each other, creating life. And even though she isn't here anymore, it still exists.

Speaker 1: 20:23

The curse works because I didn't realize I had been cursed, right, you don't fucking realize in the beginning. Oh, maybe I'm cursed. You know, nobody pointed out to me, nobody, they were just like. You're actually so strange, like what's my review is losing friends, I was losing family, I was losing everything in my life, everything was falling apart. I didn't know how to stop it and the curse, just like, took hold of all power over me and it's you know, when you've lived through that experience, people could be like, oh, you're making it up or oh, you know what the fuck? Honestly, I could never wish this on my worst enemy, the. You know, he did some horrible things to me and he did some horrible things to my family, to my friends, like messaging them, like harassing them.

Speaker 1: 21:04

My friends had to watch me fall apart and, like now, there's actually anxiety in my friendship relationships whenever I get into a relationship, because they're like they don't want this to happen to me again, which is really, really sad to see. You can see them being really hurt from that experience and I hate that. I hurt my friends, I hate that I hurt the family around me and I hate that after this, it took so long for me to put myself back together. I put myself back together stronger, but it took a really long time to get back to being able to help people, to help myself, to open up, to open up spiritually again, to come back into this embodiment, embodiment, embodiment of me, um, but I'm here now. I'm here now and I'm not going anywhere, but also I know what the this feels like now and I know how to protect myself against it. And you know, I see people opening up spiritually all the time and I cannot tell you how important it is to protect yourself.

Speaker 1: 21:59

These things very rarely happen. Okay, this happened to me, but I would say it happens maybe like 5% of the time, right, people don't. You know. Nine times out of 10, people are not walking around causing this fucking shit for no reason. You know what I mean? It's always a there's always something behind it. And now, like I've not heard of him for years. It was a year ago yeah, not April, just gone. The. The year ago, april, when I was in Las Vegas, he had messaged my friends and I didn't respond to him. I didn't message him, I didn't say anything and I have not heard from him since I, so I assume that he's moved on as part of this process as well.

Speaker 1: 22:35

I had to, I had to forgive him, I had to let go, I had to accept what happened. I had to let go and I had to forgive him for everything that he'd done, for everything that he is and for everything he's probably gonna do as well, which was really, really hard, because how do you forgive somebody who's hurt you so much, who ruined your fucking life? But you got to, because otherwise you hang on to that resentment, into that, that difficulty. And now I'm in a new relationship, I still still get triggered by some of the things that he's done, and I'm going to pick that up in a different episode, because that deserves an episode for itself, because I think it's really interesting how, when you become more healed and you expand your window of tolerance for communication, how more fulfilling relationships can be and how close you can feel to your romantic partner. So I want to pick that up in a different episode. But I just kind of wanted to go deeper into this because on Instagram I had quite a few people reach out be you know curiosity, or they could relate to something, or they said they may be in a karmic relationship, whatever, um, you know, and if this is you, you can always reach out and speak to me. That's not a problem.

Speaker 1: 23:42

Now I've come to terms with the loss of my baby and have a connection to her soul and spirit. I have come to a point in my life now where I'm super protected and I don't fuck around with that. I have a better understanding of dark magic and voodoo and also obia as well, because it affected me. I have to understand it. It's not because you're going to practice it right. Voodoo or obia, all that stuff is closed practice unless you're initiated. But you have to have an understanding of it to know what you're up against. But the dark there's always light, and a huge part of my recovery was clearing my womb space, having healing, talking about it, understanding it, processing the emotions around it. And you know what I am so proud of the woman I am. I am so strong, I am so powerful and I help other women heal with their family line and from their inner child and from everything. And you know, I see breakthroughs every single day with my clients and I just feel so incredibly blessed that maybe I had to go through some of these experiences in life so I'm able to share with others and to help others.

Speaker 1: 24:45

I don't think we often go through experiences for the fun of it. I do think we have experiences in our life where we really need to just understand it, so that we can share with others. I don't feel like, yeah, we're dealt these situations because we can't handle them. I think we're sent them because we can and we need to work through them and that sometimes they may take a long time to work through and understand. But no, like I feel like for me there's always a path. There's always a path laid out for us in our lifetime.

Speaker 1: 25:17

You might believe in soul contracts that you agree to all these lessons before you get here. But you, you know where you pick your parents, or your parents pick you, and you're designed to go through this for a reason to heal your family, to heal yourself, to heal the collective, to share with others. Whatever the fucking thing is, know, there's a bigger reason. If you've ever experienced deep, dark pain, there's obviously some good to come out of this, even though the situation that happened can be so dark and so upset and so hateful and hurtful and all of the negativity. But when you turn that into power and into strength, this is you empowering yourself as a woman. This is about you being that strong woman, about you helping others, about you being powerful, about you doing whatever you wanted to do. Powerful, about you doing whatever you wanted to do. You are a powerhouse like.

Speaker 1: 26:06

Women have been oppressed for a very long time and the more that we share our stories, the more we heal from our stories, the more we admit that things are not okay and that we want to change and that that's absolutely fine, the more we are able to help ourselves, to heal, to share, to to become better and more empowered in our power as women. So I kind of want to leave it there. Now. That has been my story. Thanks for tuning in. I hope you learned something, or it tickled a curiosity bone within you. I don't know why I said that, but here we go. We're at the end of the podcast now. If you need anything, then do send me a message. Send me a message, let me know if you listen, let me know if you resonated, or you can always like leave a review on the podcast. That always helps me to understand if I'm talking shit and if it's actually helpful. So yeah, I'm gonna see you next week, babe. Lots of love, bye, thank you.