Find Your Inner Glow Podcast

Breaking Free from the Sunk Cost Fallacy: It's Time To Ditch What Isn't Working, Embrace Change, Follow Your Intuition & Transform Your Life.

Kirsty Harris

Have you ever felt stuck in a situation just because you've already invested so much into it? Today, we're tackling the sunk cost fallacy—a cognitive bias that can keep us tethered to unfulfilling projects, relationships, or businesses due to the resources we've already sunk into them. I share my own transformative journey from a twerk instructor to an alignment coach, showcasing how embracing change can lead to a more fulfilling and aligned life. We'll shed light on recognizing when it's time to let go and how to pivot towards endeavors that truly resonate with our passions and goals.

We'll also dive into the importance of following your intuition instead of succumbing to external pressures like social media comparisons. Using the metaphor of "Becky with a good hair," we'll discuss how to appreciate our unique paths and practice gratitude for our past experiences. This episode is packed with inspiring insights on making bold changes, taking inspired actions, and tuning into your inner knowing to fulfill your karmic destiny. If you're feeling the urge to reinvent your life, connect with me on LinkedIn and Instagram, and don't forget to subscribe and leave a review. Let's embark on this journey of transformation together!

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Kirsty

Speaker 1:

Hello and welcome back. Today I'm giving you your permission to quit. So I was just driving along and I was like, oh my god, I need to talk about this, I need to talk about this, you know where. You're. Just like, oh my god, I need to just really talk about the sunk cost fallacy in massive detail, because people, like I think people hear of this but they don't really realise how it impacts their lives. Right? So the sunk cost fallacy have you ever found yourself sticking with a project, a relationship, a business, whatever, because you've invested so much time, effort and money into it? If so, this is the sunk cost fallacy.

Speaker 1:

Okay, it's basically this cognitive basis that leads us to continue something because of the investment that we've made into it. We have may have that friendship of 10 years that we've made an effort with, so we're not going to kick her to the curb now, even though she's acting like a dickhead. We may not want to give up on that business idea because we've given so much money to it. Or we might spend effort away from our friends and family to try and make something work and it's not working, but we still throw time and energy at it because, yeah, we've sunk that time into it, and if we don't do it, then we have just wasted that time and I feel like this isn't just a you thing, it isn't a me thing, it's a collective thing. It is literally like a cognitive bias that we have and it's just something that it is literally like a cognitive bias that we have and it's just something that's built within us. Like you know, we met. We make so much effort, we put so much money in, we spend so much time is we shouldn't let that thing go right? But we are really doing ourselves a disservice. So, instead of making decisions based on the current and future costs, we continue to throw things, throw money, energy into this thing. That doesn't really. That doesn't really matter. Okay, it doesn't really matter. It's not working. It's not an alignment to us. It makes us feel like shit when we do it. So why are we doing it? Okay?

Speaker 1:

So let's talk about some examples. You may have been working on your business for the last two years, but it just doesn't feel right. It doesn't light you up anymore, it's a chore, clients are a bit of a nightmare, but you don't want to change anything because of the time that you've invested in it. You've got your brand, you've got your marketing, you've got your Instagram of how many followers you're. You've said you do this on LinkedIn, so that's, that's you right. But have you ever thought that maybe you just grow?

Speaker 1:

Okay, and even though your business isn't growing you don't like the work that you do? Clients are really difficult you still continue to throw everything into this thing because otherwise it would be a waste of time. No, like I really do invite you to reframe this. Instead of being like this has been a waste, waste of time, I invite you to say I'm grateful for this experience, but it's not working for me anymore. If it's not serving you, it has to go.

Speaker 1:

And I feel like at the moment, there's like a really big collective push around things that are no longer serving us, that need to just be removed. Okay, when you get rid of things that drain your energy, you create space for incredible things to come into your life. And even though it's scary and you have to take that risk, okay, and I often see it with like people who just they hang on to their existing experience because it's better. The devil you know and I can promise you now, it is never better. The devil, you know, when you're in alignment, when you understand yourself, when you are someone who is really going to do the work because they love it, because they're passionate about it, because it sets their freaking soul on fire, then that's such a different energy to carrying on with something, because you're just throwing the energy into it, right, and this is what happened for me. So, if you didn't join me right at the start of my beginning, I actually started my business as a twerk instructor and now I'm a alignment coach and soul journey practitioner.

Speaker 1:

Like there's been a jump. Okay, there's been a jump, and I used to get so frustrated with myself because things would unfold and I'd feel like, okay, I need to change, I need to, something needs to unfold and I need to change. But the fact of it was I was becoming more and more in alignment with myself, I was understanding myself more, I was growing, I was developing and the thing that I've I'm really proud to say is I've not really hung on to something for too long that hasn't been serving me. So, for example, I love to be a twerk instructor. Oh, my god, like I'll tell you how I got into this.

Speaker 1:

So it was lockdown and I, we, everyone was online. Right. We were all doing stuff and, yeah, I just decided, fuck it, I'm gonna do this twerk class. And, oh my god, I loved it. I loved it. Never been a fitness instructor in my life but there was something within me that was like I need to do this because I love it and I want to hold this space for other people. I want to be able to hold this space for other women and if you've ever done a twerk after work class, you know that it's not just your normal regular dance class. Okay, it's really, really special.

Speaker 1:

So I decided I was like shit, I'm just going to do it. And I and I feel like I'm so grateful to be one of those people who just goes, fuck it, I'll do it, I'll find out and I'll worry about the rest later. I know that there's lots of people out there that don't do that, but I just kind of had this like nagging feeling of you need to do it, you need to do it, you need to do it. So I did it. I qualified, we came out of lockdown and then I started holding classes in Bristol, did that for 18. Well, I did it for a while and then took a break and then went back for 18 months and it was amazing. I met so many amazing women. Like to see them grow each week to get better in dancing, but also like just to see their confidence rise. Like it was so incredible.

Speaker 1:

And this was where I knew empowering women was something that was so important to me, right so, cause obviously I've been in the criminal justice system for the last 12 years like empowering women, allowing them to take control of their lives, have been absolutely something that is so, so profound and so important for me. And I was able to do this outside of work as well. Right, so I'm getting my cup double filled and I loved being a twerk instructor, and this is where I realized, like I really loved empowering women, and this is where I launched divinity with Kirsty. Okay, because I really wanted to help people, and something that drew me to twerk was that when you shake your hips okay, your emotions are stored in your body, and when we are shaking, this is what is really, really important for us, right it? Because we release those emotions that are trapped within our body by shaking, and I would have women at the end of twerk classes crying and having this purge of emotion and I'm just like fuck, yeah, like, fuck, yeah, like this is real movement, this Like this is real movement, this is real change, this is real confidence happening. And you know, I felt so blessed to be able to hold such a beautiful space for these women Like so, so incredible.

Speaker 1:

And I launched Divinity with Kirsty, which was a coaching business, but it wasn't aligned. Guess what Didn't happen, didn't work out. And then I moved into Holistic Coach Kirsty. This was more around like mind, body and soul, the aspects, and then I realized I'm trying to do too much. I also incorporated my healing into it and my healing journey has massively changed from just being a Reiki practitioner to a soul journey practitioner. Now, like, everything in my life has leveled up because I followed my intuition, I followed my spirit guides, I followed the things that made me really happy. Okay, so holistic coach, that was good. I got a few clients. It was mainly raw around like the healing and the Reiki aspect of things which worked really well for me at that time and I was just like it doesn't really feel right. So then I started to go into manifestation. Right, because I've been manifesting for a really fucking long time.

Speaker 1:

Manifesting is just like when you like, everyone talks about manifestation like it's hard. But once you know what it is and you implement it and you integrate it, it's just like another thing that you just do with your day. Okay, it's just something that you just go okay, I'm just going to do this, or this is how I think, or this is the energy I'm putting out into the world. That's it, that's all that matters. Um, so yeah, manifestation doesn't have to be deep, it just has to be a way of thinking and a way of conducting your life.

Speaker 1:

So, manifestation coach for a while, realize, no, like I'm not really really a manifestation coach anymore. There's a lot of levels to me. There's a lot of depth to me. I'm not just a manifestation coach, I'm actually a spiritual transformation coach. So we go through that, that and yeah, we just go through it. And now I'm like, even on, my intro says spiritual transformation coach. I need to change that.

Speaker 1:

But what's really important for me is to get these messages out right. I haven't got time to re-record stuff sometimes. So, yeah, for me to get these messages out. I gotta get them out now because otherwise I'll lose them. But yeah, I will be changing my intro soon into, like, alignment coach and soul journey practitioner, but I was a spiritual transformation coach for a while, where I was teaching people how to get back in touch with their intuition, how to connect to spirit guides, and going through this healing process where my healing didn't just go from Reiki anymore, it went to aura work, it went to chakra alignment, it went to being able to take people through guided meditations to to release blocks in their body that they need to.

Speaker 1:

It took me into regression. It took me into past life regression. It took me into regressing back to childhood and remapping memories. Like it was incredible, like the stuff that I was following through my own intuition and through my spirit guide guidance. So I can't, like I can't, babe, like I can't even tell you like how incredible that has been to be able to follow it. And now I have.

Speaker 1:

I landed here where I am right now alignment coach and soul journey practitioner. I've decided to brand my healing as soul journeys because this is way more than Reiki. It's way more than aura cleansing. It's that really deep work where I pull elements from shamanic healing. Put it's very eclectic. So this is where soul journeying comes from, because we're taking your soul on a journey through the session right whilst I'm doing energy healing on you, whilst I'm doing Reiki, you're having that energy healing as well as being able to go through things and to really get in touch with your soul. So taking your soul on a freaking journey like how fucking cool is that, I love it, and like this feels really aligned to me right now, where being a Reiki practitioner didn't. Yeah, that's where the alignment came. And the alignment coach is because I'm not a business coach, but I really want women to be in alignment with themselves, with their intuition, because if I've learned anything from being in a room with millionaires, it's that when we are doing it, when we are there, when we are listening to our intuition, our intuition and our body knows the next step and the body knows the next step.

Speaker 1:

Isn't my line, is it from a beautiful woman called linda, who's a breathwork practitioner, who I'm absolutely obsessed with. I'm working with her at the moment and breathwork has just absolutely changed my life, so I would highly recommend following l. I'll put her thing below, actually, because I think everybody needs a Linda in their life, but I think, yeah, for me, I'm not going to be a breathwork practitioner, I'm going to be somebody who, oh, I might be a breathwork practitioner? I don't know yet, but it doesn't feel in alignment to me. I feel like I wanna be that person who is able to take people on soul journeys to bring them back into alignment, will come up and call the shots in so many different places, right?

Speaker 1:

So this is my invitation to you to be like don't hold on to things deeply and harshly. Like, don't, white knuckle hold on to things that are not serving you, okay, because it will only fail. It's only going to fail. So, the more that you allow yourself to be in flow, to follow your intuition, to let your intuition be your guiding star, not to be the fucking thing on Instagram that Becky with a good hair has. Honestly, I don't know, I've made up this Becky with a good hair thing.

Speaker 1:

Like, if you follow me on any of my socials, you know I'm always ranted about Becky with a good hair. Becky with a good hair don't exist, but like, you know what I mean. Like I imagine Becky to be like this person who's got great hair, she has everything, she's got a fucking Lamborghini, she's got this big house. She lays on a bed of money and gets fucked by her model boyfriend, who is just absolutely sensational with her two kids, who are perfect. They look like something out of the like Beckhams, where they're just so put together and lush, like, honestly, that's what I imagine Becky with the with the best hair to have. But she don't exist. I don't follow anyone called Becky who lives that lifestyle right, but I just kind of like you all have that Becky in your life who you compare yourself to. Okay, that's just it.

Speaker 1:

But I want to invite you to be grateful for your experiences. Okay, you had to learn the lessons that you had to stand on the, on the shoulders of the version of you that went through it. Okay, so don't fucking beat yourself up about it. Don't hang on to that previous version of you. Why? Because you're just being stuck in the past. Let her go. Be grateful for her, be grateful for everything that you've had, be grateful for the lessons that you've had. You know, if it's not serving you, it has to go and like.

Speaker 1:

People ask me what do you think? I'm like? No, what do you think? What does your body tell you when I say to you that your business isn't growing and it isn't in alignment? How does that feel? Does that actually make you feel seen and validated or does it make you feel like, fuck you, kirsty. It is like, because if it's not making you go, fuck you Kirsty, it is then literally, what are you doing? Like? What are you doing? That's it. Whatever drains your energy has to go, and I feel like I had this as well, like I felt, but before I moved the bigger you get in your business, the the bigger the risk. Okay, so when I started to make this change from clients that I was working with to changing my target audience, to working with women in business, I was just like Hmm, this is this. Is it Like I'm letting go of that group of people that got me to where I was? And that was a really difficult thing to let go of, right, because I felt like I owed them something. I felt like I owed them so much, but actually I was just so deeply grateful for them, and now they've helped me, create a foundation for me to go on and help even more people.

Speaker 1:

Okay, you're meant for greatness. You're meant to do good things. You're meant to fulfill your karmic destiny, which is yours and yours alone. Okay, the world has never seen anybody like you. If you look at your birth chart, you're one in, I think 13 octillion like that's. Even I don't even. I didn't even know that was a number, didn't even know that was a number until I read that statistic. So the world and this earth has never seen anybody like you. So why are you trying to fulfill the destiny of somebody else? The answer should be no. I'm not going to do that. I'm going to follow my intuition. I'm gonna get into alignment. I'm gonna figure out what's important to me. I'm gonna understand what my why is like. Why am I here? Why am I trying to set this thing up? Why am I doing these things? Because making money, being happy, is not specific enough. What are the actions that you need to take to create that 12 month version of you? Like, where are you in 12 months? How do you create that version of you? What are the actions that you can take? And you have to do that inspired action. Okay, oh, that manifestation coach is coming up right now. That inspired action, that action of fuck. I'm going to get up and I'm going to do this.

Speaker 1:

I said this in my last episode of like when I wake up in the morning, I do what I need to. Then I look at my phone and then I'm like, okay, what is speaking to me today? What do I need to talk about today? And then, when I feel it, I'm like, fuck, yeah, I need to talk about that today. I'm itching to get on the flow from my heart space, like that's how I record my podcast, that's how I bring the energy, that's how I bring the charge with my podcast.

Speaker 1:

That's why I'm coming here and I'm saying really controversial things of how to do business, when I'm not a business coach. Right, I'm an alignment coach. I'm not here to tell you how to run your business, how to price, how to do things. I'm telling you how to become the best decision maker in your business and your inner knowing your intuition is the best coach you will ever hire. This is what's going to happen, okay, you're going to have the best coach. That is already within you. Like I said, linda says the body always knows the next step. Your intuition always knows the next step. So why are you denying it? And also like I'm going to say it again because I say it all the time your intuition is your best friend. And if you stop talking to your best friend, guess what? She's going to? Stop talking to you. She's going to not have time to come through.

Speaker 1:

So this is a really short episode. I really wanted it to be impactful about the sunk cost fallacy Stop investing time into things that no longer serve you. I don't care if you've done this for six months, a year, 10 years. If that relationship is not serving you, if that business isn't serving you, burn it, the fuck down, start again. What is your heart telling you that you need to be doing? What is your tummy telling you that you need to do? Need to be doing?

Speaker 1:

Being in that job for eight years, quit it. Do you know what? I stayed in a job for eight years and well, I worked the same same salary for eight years. But then one day I decided I'm fucking done with this. And guess what? I started to apply for higher ticket jobs and I got a 15,000 pound increase on my next job. Why? Because I knew I could do it. I was so busy sinking energy into this is my career path. This is my career path. This is my career path that I got blindsided and actually got taken for granted for got undervalued from the skill that I brought to my jobs, right. So this is when I decided fine, fuck it. I'm going to push myself out of my comfort zone. I'm going to apply for 50, 60, 70 000 pound jobs and guess what? I got one of them. I got one of them. I had a 15 grand increase on my first job. And guess what? That job was easy. That job was fine.

Speaker 1:

So don't be afraid to let go of things. I have had so many stories in my life where I've clung onto things and then let go. I've not clung onto them for too long, but there has been that. You know that wibbly wobbly moment of should I, shouldn't I, should I, shouldn't I fuck it. I'm going to do it. Whatever gonna do it. Whatever happens, it happens, and if you make a mistake, you learn from it. You don't ever really fail, you just learn. That's ultimately it.

Speaker 1:

So if you loved this episode and you want even more spicy content like this, connect with me on linkedin, come over to my instagram, speak to me. If this really resonated with you and you're like shit, kristy, I'm about to burn my relationship, my house, my, my, my entire life and start again, let me know, because I want to know who I've inspired to do this. So yeah, sending you loads of love. I'm going to speak to you soon. Catch you next Monday. Love you loads, don't forget to subscribe, leave a review and, yeah, preferably five stars, but if you don't say what you mean, mean what you say. Love you loads. Goodbye what you say. Love you loads, goodbye.